21 April 2006

Blogging from La La Land

I am blogging from Universal City, where I'm attending an academic conference with family in tow. In fact, as I type, hubby is at the theme park with the Things while I prepare for my presentation this afternoon. I understand there's a yarn store called Unwind not too far away, so I may try to sneak in a visit tomorrow.

Thing 2 misheard the name of one of the rides at Universal Studios, and keeps insisting she wants to go on the Mommy Ride. It made me start thinking, what if there really was such a ride? Giant, harrassed-looking women would pop out and yell, "Eat your vegetables! Stop bothering your sister!" And of course, the dreaded, "Go to bed!!"

Or maybe it's a scary ride for Mommies (as if we needed such a thing). You embark on a transcontinental airline flight with two overtired, overstimulated children, ages 2 and 5. Shortly after the plans takes off, you realize you have no diapers or binkies. The younger child gets airsick and projectile vomits on you. The older child has several tantrums. In the next section, your children are older. One kid gets called to the principal's office and later bonks her head on the monkeybars, requiring a trip to the ER. The other kid comes down with something messy and contagious the morning your husband's out of town and you have an important meeting. I don't know what awaits you in the next section. Kids learn to drive? Daughters start dating? ARRGGHHH!! Let me off this ride!

2 comments:

Knatolee said...

Goodness. A "Mommy Ride" would be worse than the Haunted House! :O

Phyllis said...

Exactly. Because monsters and spooks don't really exist--children do!